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Papa van vier dochtertjes toont de brutale realiteit van het vaderschap.

Een vader genaamd Simon Hooper uit Londen heeft het niet altijd gemakkelijk met de opvoeding van zijn vier dochters. De toegewijde vader deelt dagelijks zijn avonturen op Instagram en dat leverde hem bijna een miljoen volgers op. De foto’s tonen de harde en brutale realiteit van het vaderschap. We krijgen een geweldige inkijk van wat het is om vier dochtertjes in huis te hebben.

Zoals je je wel kunt voorstellen, is het leven met vijf vrouwen niet gemakkelijk. Maar Simon leerde ook enkele belangrijke levenslessen. De Father of daughters, zoals de 35-jarige Brit ook wel genoemd wordt, is ondertussen een echte internetster geworden.

De foto’s zijn niet in scène gezet, maar tonen de eerlijke realiteit van het vaderschap. Simon wil zichzelf laten zien zoals zijn leven is. Hij wil niet de illusie creëren dat het opvoeden van vier dochters een eenvoudige klus zou zijn.

Geniet hieronder van zijn hilarische kiekjes!

1 – Het is soms erg moeilijk om hen in bed te krijgen!

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Conventional wisdom tells us that the passage of time through space happens at a constant rate forwards, but when you have children, that changes. I can only conclude that there's a rip in the space time continuum right above the girls bedroom as time just vanished this evening, leaving me feeling like I'd be screwed hard by a flux capacitor with anger management issues. One moment it's 6.30pm & I'm rounding them up for a bath, then I blinked & it was 8.15pm the world had fallen apart. Bath time – a tsunami nightmare that would have drowned the entire cast of 'honey I shrunk the kids'. Teeth – a stand off that ended in toothpaste in the eyes. Story time – A jackanory balls up that left me questioning my life choices. Bed time – a yoga session for hyperactive chipmunks that ended with Ottie hiding for 15 minutes in silence & me shouting down the street in the dark because I thought she'd gone (only to be found eating a chocolate egg under Anya's desk covered in a blanket). Of course, as I'd focused all my energy on these 2, the elder ones hadnt even had dinner! It may have only been a total of 1hr 45 minutes but I've aged several years on the process. I'm stongly considering calling Doc Brown to take be back to 2015 so I can get a vasectomy. #doctakemebacktogetavasectomy #ihatetuesday #screwedbyyimetravel #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod

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2 – Wie niet groot is, moet slim zijn …

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Either Delilah is using the fridge to conduct climate simulation training for a nursery day trip up the north face of the Eiger that I don't remember signing the consent form for or I've just caught the person responsible of foot prints in the butter & the constant vanishing of yoghurts, frankfurters, grapes, blueberries and cheese strings. This also explains why she always had a cold stomach and looks permanently guilty. Note to all fridge designers – I need a decent fridge lock and shelves that can't be used and steps. Anyone got any bright ideas to stop the human fridge magnets that doesn't involve gaffer tape? #coldweathertrainingsimulator #ohnoitsafridge #thisexplainsalot #gaffertapeperhaps #humanfridgemagnet #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod

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3 – Vijf vrouwen in huis … dat levert een heleboel haren op in het putje!

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As a guy, no one warns you that when you have daughters, you're going to spend a good proportion of your future dealing with hair related issues. Growing up, the most my parents had to deal with was when I dumped an entire bottle of peroxide in my hair, turning it thr colour of the rising sun & burning my scalp like forgotten bacon in the process. But when you combine the facts that we have more hair in our house than a cousin IT convention, and that our girls have follicles with have no grip, you end up living with clogged drains, balls of hair placed around the house, nit epidemics, meals with a side helping of hair, endless brushing & plaiting (usually accompanied by screaming), hair brushes that are more hair than brush, vaccum cleaners that no longer work thanks to being bound with wads of the stuff and so many hair products that I'm now close to being forced to keep my sad little collection of out of date toiletries in a bag that hangs out the window. I'm strongly considering just shaving their heads in their sleep but realise they just end up looking like a bunch of juvenile offenders. #Haireverywhere #shavethekids #challengesofbeingsurroundedbywomen #hairalldaylong #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod

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4 – Even uitblazen zit er niet in …

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No, this is not a background extra milking their scene in some low budget B movie horror film. It's the moment when I was getting headshots taken for my book & Ottie decided she absolutely positively couldn't give me a moment to myself – transforming my moment, very much into her moment. Clemmie scooped her up seconds later & I can laugh at this now but it does remind me just how hard it can be to achieve the simplest of tasks when a wailing child is within close promixity – thanks @philippajames for catching the memory & exposing the realities behind the image you see in the book! (Click on the link in my bio to get a copy) #backgroundscenegrabber #stealingmymoment #zombietoddler #theimagebehindtheimage #parenthoodinapicture #foreveroutnumbered #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #fod #instadad

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5 – En als je dan al even een dutje wil doen …

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I seriously believe that all parents suffer from some form of mild Stockholm syndrome. Depsite being oppressed & forced to work a servant to our pint sized captures, like a free buffet lunch, we always come back for more. This is especially true when I go away for work. The first day I embrace my freedom & revel in that rarest of commodities – silence. But within 48 hours I strangely miss being yelled at & forced to clear up other people's poo and start to really pine for home. In my mind I would return to 4 perfect children who would greet me with open arms & proclaim their lives were incomplete in my absense. The reality was 50% of my girls acknowledged my return & within 5 minutes my tired jet lagged body had been transformed into fleshy climbing apparatus while i listened to a list of things that broke while I was away & now needed fixing. I don't think Anya even knows I went away as she's now permanently hard wired into Fortnite! I sure they missed me but it still amazes me how quickly normality is resumed! #institutionalised #parentingstockholmsyndrome #givemeachance #likeineverleft #jetlag #Fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod

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6 – Ook de kinderen in bad steken, is een hele beproeving.

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Did anyone else get the memo to inform all parents that its international opposites day today? No? Me neither but Apparently all children have been informed it's totally ok to do the exact opposite of what all overbearing full grown humans tell them to do. Case in point – this evening's Bathtime – I said "please stop splashing! mummy will kill me when I forget to tidy this up later". What they heard was "please go ahead & start up a toddler induced wave machine the scale of which could be used to test war ships, soak the floor & then flail about like a confined depressed killer whale which will eventually eat it's trainer". Turns out it's fine though as the water has now drained through the cracks in the floor boards & has seeped through the ceiling downstairs. This only even happens when I'm in charge on my own. Coincidence? #bathtimetusnami #theyremakingmelookbad #ineedflooddefences #imadeadman #thewaterisnowdownstairs #Fatherofdaughters #fod #dadlife #instadad

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7 – Goed smeren hadden ze gezegd.

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Children are basically human versions of a 'find my phone' app – as annoying as it maybe, if kids are making a noise, you then at least know where they are, it's when they're silent that you need to worry as it usually results in a mess I'll get blamed for, a lot of scrubbing & a dubious home insurance claim. This evening I walked in on the aftermath of 'operation sunblock' – a covert operation to liberate all the suncream from my confines of my bedside drawer. The results – 2 well moisturised guilty looking girls who smelt like holiday & won't be getting a tan anytime soon & a floor more slippery that an overexcited eel who'd just won a jelly wrestling competition. Lessons to learn: 1). if its silent, something bad is happening & 2). I will always be the blame even if when I'm nowhere near the scene of the crime. #howisthismyfault #whykeepsuncreamthere #ghostkids #slipperywhenwet #itwasntme #twins #operationsunblock #Fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod

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8 – Een toegewijde papa doet alles voor zijn dochtertjes!

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Yes I do look like the mid 30's love child of a Disney Princess and the Easter bunny or perhaps an unsuccessful drag act you'd find on a cruise liner who specialises in animal impressions, but this what happens when you let you children projectile vomit the contents of the dressing up box onto you. Clemmie walked in on us after l having called us for dinner multiple times to find what must look like the hangers-on who are still sleeping in field 2 days after the festival finished – me, a blond Bob Dylan lookalike, a fairy & a disgruntled Delilah who was livid that the very hungry Caterpillar costume was covered in welded on weetabix. Clemmie turned & walked out in silence – you said you'd take me in sickness and in health – well dressing up is my sickness. Now, how do you dislocate your shoulders to get out of this human body trap? #cruiserlinerentertainment #disneylovechild #dressingup #imcomfortablewithwhoiam #Fatherofdaughters #dadlife #fod #instadad

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9 – En deze situatie kent elke vader wel …

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Irrespective of how long a car journey maybe, on the way home, I can put safely put own manhood on the fact all XX chromosome carrying members of my family will be quietly inspecting the insides of their eye lids within 10 minutes as they are prolific car sleepers. It's as if I'd secretly pumped the car full of chloroform as I watch them slowly succumb to its effects & shut down their operating systems one by one in age order, starting with the twins & ending with clemmie slumped beside me. For the rest of the journey, I'm essentially driving everyone around in a mobile sleep clinic & I truly love it as Its one of those occasions I get to experience somethig rarer than an flying pig performing duet with Beyonce during an eclipse on my birthday – silence while still in the presence of my girl gang. Being the designated driver has its benefits! #dadjobs #carnapping #silenceisgolden #lightsout #designateddriverbenefits #Fatherofdaughters #fod #instadad #dadlife

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10 – Even rusten, zei ze.

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Just so we're clear, this isn't an ad!! This evening I successfully picked up all 4 girls & completed an emergency shop on the way home. With my arms laden with life admin essentials, everyone disembarked from the car & bounded off towards the house, arguing over who could scream the loudest. Every that is apart from Ottie, who instead decided to do her best impression of discarded flavourless chewing gum & welded herself to the pavement. A 2 minute silent stand ensued during which time 3 people walked passed this small human obstacle & tried to help encourage her to give up on horizontal protest / cloud gazing session, yet she proved to be tougher to shift than lipstick from a carpet (and that's tough, believe me). I honestly couldn't tell you why this all started, but it finished with her getting up, starring at me with death ray eyes that went straight through heart and walked off as if I was nothing had happened. I've been in meetings where I wished I'd employed this tactic. Oh to be 2 again. #toddlerstandoff #bemoreottie #gumimpressionisonpoint #noidea #parenting #Fatherofdaughters #fod #dadlife #instadad #twins

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Ontdek meer leuke foto’s op zijn Instagram en DEEL dit met je vrienden als ook jij dit zo herkenbaar vond!

Bron en afbeeldingen: Instagram en Bored Panda

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